(405) 919-9901

By Dave Moore, CISSP
11/06/2022

Back in 2006 I wrote a column titled, “How to spy on your kids,” which caused a bit of a fuss in that some parents loved it, some parents worried I was revealing parental “trade secrets,” and some teens declared me persona non grata.

Now, those teens have grown up and are feeling the need to spy on a different generation of kids. While many of the original needs and principles remain the same, much of the technology has changed, so an update of the original column is in order.

No parent really wants to spy on their children. We simply wish that they would be up front with us, tell us what’s going on in their lives, and allow us to help them. However, sometimes that is not the case, and we must use other means to keep up with what our kids are really doing. The importance of Internet safety increases with every passing day; protecting children from the dangers of the Internet is serious business.

The Internet makes it very easy to live a double life. In “real” life, when someone else’s child visits your house to take your child out on a date, you get the opportunity to look them over, and decide if you like what you see. But, what if your child goes out on “Internet” dates? Unknown to you, they and their online “BF” may be exchanging intimate emails, instant messages, photos and videos, when all the while you think that the glow of the computer screen on their face means that they’re doing their homework.

I personally know of one teenage girl who had a secret teenage Internet boyfriend, and was all set to run away to Colorado to pay him a visit, when somehow her plans were exposed. Some investigation revealed that Mr. Dreamboat was actually about 45 years old.

So, the situation arises that you need to know more about your children’s online activities. Employers have the same needs in tracking the online activities of their employees. You can hire someone to do it for you, or you can take the do-it-yourself approach. Either way, just like in a high-tech spy thriller, some sneaky technology tools will be needed to get the job done.

Protection is different from spying. Both Windows and Mac computers, as well as iPads, iPhones and Android phones have built-in “parental controls.” Parental controls enable protections for your kids, blocking certain types of websites and activities. GPS trackers also fall under the category of protection.

These protections are not hard to setup and use, but you will need to learn about parental controls and then follow through. To get started, do a Google search for your particular device, followed by the words “parental controls.” For example, a search for “iPhone parental controls” will lead you directly to the Apple website’s instructions on how it’s done.

Spying on your kids is information gathering; who, what, where, when, why. Some pundits say you should notify your kids what you are going to do, and how things will work; others suggest you keep it to yourself. That’s for you to decide.

The Number One app for spying on your kids’ cell phones and tablets is mSpy. Visit www.mspy.com to learn all about it. The mSpy service runs around $20 monthly, with lower prices if you buy a full year. I think, for what mSpy does, the price is a bargain.

For spying on Microsoft Windows PC’s and Apple Mac computers, Spyrix is a high-quality solution, at www.spyrix.com. There are different pricing tiers depending on what features you want, like screen recording, call recording, etc. Piling on all the available features can get pricy, but only you can determine what these items are worth to you.

Some may say that using these tools is too sneaky or deceitful. I call it a parents right to know about and protect their children.

Dave Moore, CISSP, has been fixing computers in Oklahoma since 1984. Founder of the non-profit Internet Safety Group Ltd, he also teaches Internet safety community training workshops. He can be reached at 405-919-9901 or www.internetsafetygroup.com